How beautiful it is to acknowledge & shine the light on all the beautiful people in our lives who have been there, shared, cared & helped us in so many ways on our personal development journeys.
And today I wanted to shine the light on my mother...
Perhaps not in the way you imagine...
For the longest time I wanted her to be like all the other mums I knew.
I watched & listened to my friends share stories of all that their mums did for them. Cooking, cleaning, laundry, the hugs, day spas, shopping together, the lunches & dinners. I’d see them often at the gates picking up their daughters (my friends) children, their grandchildren from school. They were at all the grandkids sporting events, award ceremonies, they babysat & took the grandkids away for holidays & over night stays. I saw the beautiful photos & laughter of these children with their grandparents & I so desperately wanted that for my children too.
I would watch & dream of those moments but they rarely, if ever came.
My mum was a very strong, determined, beautiful woman & she loved us no question. She always looked stylish & took good care of herself, appearance wise.
But she, as I would discover over the years had so many fears, doubts & experiences that knocked her down & she didn’t have the support or access to the abundance of helpful information we do today. There weren’t support groups like we enjoy & learn from & can share our experiences. No doubt they were around but not as easy to find or easily accessible in convenient locations or online. I have watched her decline over the last 10 years, into a shell of who she once was, it is heart breaking, as the alcohol dependency left her with severe alcoholic induced dementia. I do what I can for her, as does my sister as we have been blessed to have each other through this journey together.
As I’ve grown & travelled along in my personal development journey it became clear that often our family, our parents, in this case my mum will never be what I longed for. This is a hard fact many of us face as we desperately want their approval, guidance, support & acknowledgement of all the things we’ve done that have lifted us up & helped others. In all the things we’ve accomplished. Along with all those moments we’ve struggled, cried, been so low... to have them there with us, feeling, sharing & showing their empathy & compassion. In my case & many of you I know... this will never be.
But as I sit here writing this to you I can say my mum has taught me to be strong, to be independent & self-sufficient. She has shown me love in her own unique way & although it never showed up in the way I wanted, it was there & I have chosen to see the best in her. I have chosen to see the joy, the gratitude in the good times we spent together. For every single one of us has our own struggles, our doubts, our fears & experiences that have moulded us into the women we are today, many came from our parents, which we will never know or atleast not in great detail.
We are unique & have the freedom to be who we are, to not take onboard thoughts, beliefs, opinions & actions of others, including all those we take onboard from our parents & carry around as such a heavy burden & weight upon our shoulders. Sabotaging our lives, creating sadness & blocking us from truly loving & receiving.
We can choose to find our truth, our beliefs, our thoughts that serve our highest good & the highest good of others & not allow ourselves to wallow in all we’d desperately hoped for from others but never received.
Every single human being on the planet is on their own journey, they express, share, care in their own unique way based on their experiences, beliefs & the choices they have made with the knowledge they had at the time. Some good, some not so good, but they, as we are, free to choose. Free to go out & access all they can to better themselves, improve their lives & become the best version of themselves. For many we associate with, including our families they have not chosen that path, perhaps they are still unaware of the impact they have & the choices available to them... but we know & if you didn’t you do now.
You are free to choose the life you live, you are free to learn & grow & live consciously, mindfully of the choices you make, the impact you have & the legacy you leave behind.
You are free to forgive & understand that we each have that freedom & you are in 100% control of what you choose to do with all the information you have, all the experiences you’ve had, the love, the forgiveness, the compassion, the empathy, the understanding & kindness you give not only to yourself but all those you come in contact with.
Let us all look through the eyes of love & understanding,
Let us choose to see the good in others,
Let us be empathetic, kind & compassionate always,
Let us take onboard only that which is for our highest good & the highest good of others & let the rest go,
Let us acknowledge that we are free to choose as is everyone else with the level of knowledge we have, knowing there’s access to so much beautiful information & mentors to help us shift, change & become a better version of ourselves, a beautiful example to the world.
If in that choice others pick up on that & see the difference, feel the beautiful energy of our choices & shifts & make the same choice for themselves to grow - beautiful & amen that will always be our hope & prayer but If they don’t, let us send them love & continue on our journey to becoming & being our most beautiful, authentic selves.
With freedom, love, grace & understanding.
Photo: Pinterest; weheartitKaren Offord › Blog 2019 › With freedom love grace and understanding
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