Do you ever look at certain people and think "man they've got it
together!"
Or I wish I was like that!
It's so easy to put people you admire, look up to or see in the spotlight, on a
pedestal. To believe, think and convince yourself that they have it all
together. "Life is surely perfect for them". They always look and
sound so brilliant, professional, confident, calm or beautiful. Driving the
best cars, living in beautiful homes, travelling and living the 'dream
lifestyle'
How easy it is from a distance...
My thoughts travelled down that path often, many years ago, when I was still
finding my way. I'd think how is it possible? My thinking would then lead to
anger or self-pity; "It's not fair or I must just be hopeless". Back then my self-esteem was low
and my doubts and self-criticisms were high. I'd actually get excited when I
saw stars in magazines without make up, because it made me feel normal. Not to
mention how many times I thought surely the highly spiritual and developed
people I use to follow (in awe) would lose it once in a while. I often wished I
could just ring Anthony Robbins, Marianne Williamson or Ghandi just to ask
them, seeking confirmation that surely they must from time to time.
Our thoughts can lead us into an unnecessary ferocious battle. A fight between
our very own worth and existence. Comparison leading the charge with full force
and a big red flag. The only hope being a brief, mild, state of depression.
It can be very depressing, discouraging, and downright exhausting being in this
mindset. Constantly comparing yourself and feeling less than. It can even
happen closer to home with a family member or work college that just seems to
have it all together. All their ducks lined up in a perfect row. You wonder how
is it possible. Why can't I.......... (fill in the blank)
Facebook alone is often an unreal glimpse
into the seemingly perfect life.
Maybe this thought has never crossed your mind, and may I say AWESOME. But if it
has, as it does for many, I truly know how deflating and discouraging it can be.
Especially when you’re doing your best but continue to have moments (maybe a
lot) that aren't so great. You curse, you stuff up, you lose it at someone, you
get behind and you get tired. You have a bad day, week or month.
You wonder again and again, how is it possible to have it all together, all the
time like............ (fill in your favourite mentor or guru).
I'm sure you know it doesn't have to be that way.
After years of reading, learning and personal development (long before my
studies began) I realised that everyone has not so great moments. I didn't need
to make the calls anymore to prove it. I didn't need to compare or wonder. I
didn't need to feel less than or like a failure. I just had to be the best
version of me as much as I could and accept myself for the unique human being I
was.
Because the truth is even those that
continually, read, learn and strive for improvement every day, teach and bring
you the best advice and most helpful information and resources from years of
experience: fall off the band wagon, get angry and tired. And have moments
that..... well let's just say aren't so great. You just never (or rarely) see it.
Its ok, their still inspiring.
Because they absolutely and sincerely practise what they preach. If (when) they
fall down they get back up and draw on all the resources and strength from the
learning, experience and information they share.
And for those that aren't in the spotlight, just the people you know that seem
to live a spectacular life, they too have their own battles. There either just very
good at not showing it or they too apply the right tools and information to pick themselves back up again.
The more you nurture yourself, your personal development and spiritual growth the less
you experience these not so great moments and thoughts. The quicker you pick yourself up when you fall
off the band wagon. The less you compare yourself, beat yourself up and find yourself in the midst of another emotional battlefield ready to charge into the pitfalls of despair and
depression.
Self-acceptance and self-love being your first and greatest step.
We don't need to compare ourselves to anyone, if you’re going to compare -
compare yourself with the person you were yesterday. Strive to be a better
version of you.